~You don't have to smile at them afterwards
~You don't have to get out of bed to fetch them
~They don't get tired before you do...
~You always know where your fingers have been
~For variety, you have ten to choose from
~They are also useful *out* of bed
~You can stop if you want to
~Your fingers don't want to meet your family
~Your fingers don't get jealous
~Your fingers don't smell
~Your fingers won't just fall asleep afterwards
~Your fingers don't want you to meet *their* family
~You don't get jealous of your other fingers
~Your fingers don't mind if you fall asleep afterwards
~Your fingers won't let you down
~Your mother won't critisize your fingers ~You can't get pregnant from your fingers
~Your fingers don't need batteries
~Fingers don't need adaptors to covert into the right size
~They don't shrink afterwards
~You always have them with you
~You can chew on them when you are nervous
~You can use more than 1 at a time
~They are agile
~They'll never leave you
~They are multiuse
~They want to when you want to
~They don't take up half the bed at night
~They are easy to clean
~If the ones you are using get tired, you can switch to some of the others
~They don't demand acrobatics in bed
~They don't want to try out stuff they heard from friends
~You can use them to try out stuff *you* heard from friends without worrying about it going horribly wrong
~They don't look worried when *you* want acrobatics in bed
~Your fingers don't give you bite-marks (Addition: unless you *like* bite-marks)
~You can share them with a friend
~Fingers don't cheat on you
~Fingers don't have hidden wifes/girlfriends/husbands/boyfriends/children
~Your fingers don't yelp when you give them bite marks
~For variety you can paint them any colour you want?
~Since they come on 2 hands, you can use them on 2 places at the same time
~You can use them for netsex when company is required
~They're compatible with a wide range of leather goods and electrical appliances
~No one ever fell in love with their fingers
~They'll change the video channel for you
~They won't ask: Am I the first?
~They won't be disgusted when you have your period ~They don't snore, fart, burp or have smelly breath
~They don't want you to swallow
~They don't care if your hair is a mess
~You don't have to tell them how you'd like it
~They don't brag how great they are
~They don't cost you time, money or patience
~Afterwards, they won't ask: 'Did you come?' (they just know)
~They don't leave you to sleep in the wet spot
~They're useful for scooping up nutella, chocolate, lube (take your pick) and smearing it in the appropriate places...
~Fingers don't ask who you are fantasizing about
~They don't have STDs
~Fingers are more sensitive to what you are feeling
~You don't have to bring them to room temperature
~They come in varing sizes - thumb to pinkie, or any combination thereof, it's up to you
~There're extremely gentlemanly - they'll open doors for you, pull your chair out, and even cook you dinner!
~They won't finish just before you reach orgasm
~You don't have to worry wether or not they wont come back after a goodnight
